Christmaso Concerto Maximumo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HAQvILhxfxw

Hey-
This is my 8th grade Christmas concert, with me playing Hey Jude with a couple of solos thrown in here and there. Remember awhile ago when I first talked about this concert? I believe it was my first post. [You don't believe me, eh? Check it!] My wonderful male parental unit finally uploaded this song to Youtube, under "Hey Jude by New Richmond Jazz Band". Feel free to comment it anytime. No pressure.

And who can forget the BLOW? Here we go.

1. I have always thought that it's too bad you can't buy a voodoo globe so that you could make the earth spin real fast and freak everybody out.
2. If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think what you should tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, then what you should say is, "Probably because of something you did."
3. If you're in a boxing match, try not to let the other guy's glove touch your lips, because you don't know where that glove has been.

[I don't usually have a fourth BLOW, and it isn't exactly a Blog Line of Wisdom, but this one just strikes me as funny.]

4. You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who make people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.

I will be posting two new blogs about my top 5 movies in various categories, and my 8th grade Semi-formal dance. [Just so all of you are updated on my personal life.]

Forever Yours,

Ashlie

110% Dedicated

Well... I'm back. But, good news! I've recently found out that I made it into the school play: Rumpybuttskin. Oh I'm sorry- Rumpelstilkskin. I'm the 1st lady, who has a couple of singing solos, and a whopping two lines. Unbelievable, considering last year I was a major character, but whatever. I'll take what I can get.

Also on my schedule is Honors Band & Honors Choir. [I'm such a music freak] For Honors Band: I had to pay $18 and tomorrow I'm going down to Eau Claire to audition for a spot.
For Honors Choir: I am an "elite" singer, who has been chosen to represent the New Richmond Middle School. I have to meet with the selected group this Sunday at the middle school, from 6:30-8:00pm. Then next Thursday, I need to practice with my section [I'm an alto] at 7:30am.

And on top of all that- I have Mononucleosis. Which unfortunately enough, makes me COMPLETELY EXHAUSTED by the end of the day.
It's a good thing I'm an easy-going, considerate, tolerating person. :)

On the bright side... my guitar-learning is going great! My wonderful, fantastic, loving parents bought me an awesome acoustic Epiphone for Christmas. I love it to DEATH! In lessons, I'm currently in the midst of learning the last string [low E], some necessary chords, and I'm supposed to be start thinking of some songs that I would like to learn how to play. It's a good thing I've been keeping a list of 40+ songs that I thought I might need sometime in the future.
Damn, I'm smart. Always thinking ahead.

Anyways, I've started a new A Capella Ashlie tradition. The Blog Lines Of Wisdom. [BLOW] <<< And oh my god, I had NO IDEA that Blog Lines Of Wisdom spelled blow. Do you honestly think I could come up with something as cool and witty as that? Well, I probably could. But that's not the point! Seriously, I had no idea how that worked out, but it did. And I'm glad.
Wow.

Today's Lines Of Wisdom:

1. Instead of having 'answers' on a math test, they should just call them 'impressions' and if you got a different 'impression', so what? Can't we all be brothers?
2. If you go flying back through time and you see somebody else flying forward into the future, it's probably best to avoid eye contact.
3. If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic.

Well, that's all for today.

I'LL BE BACH! [A little musical humor for ya. Hope you liked my bad pun.]

---ashlieee---

Totally Awesome Health Post

Hey- I know this is my first post in awhile [and I'm sorry!], but heck I've been busy beyond belief!

My Schedule:

Monday: School

Tuesday: Jazz band, School

Wednesday: School, Forensics practice after school, Confirmation

Thursday: Jazz Band, School, Guitar Lessons

Friday: School, Various plan with friends

Saturday: The occasional movie with boyfriend/parental units if I can fit them in somewhere

Sunday: Church, then homework crammed in at 8:30 pm

See? I told you. Pretttty busy, so don't even attempt to give me a hard time. I'm extremely lethal. But anyways, this quarter of enslavement school I'm in Health.

Go ahead, laugh, because what you're probably thinking of is Sex Ed. But it's not only about that. It's also about physical, mental, and social health. In our "Totally Awesome Health Book", [honest to God, that's the name of it] you could turn to literally ANY page in it, and feel the sudden urge to burn the book because it is SO depressing. I know the schoolwork is trying to prepare us for the "outside world", but come on... Rape? Anxiety? Eating Disorders? Meth? Suicide? And it really doesn't contribute to the students' side when the health teacher is constantly bouncing-off-the-walls, and drinking so much caffeine we think he needs to be diagnosed with ADD. I'm not saying he's a bad teacher, he's great. It's just that he needs to mellow out a little... take it down a few notches, if ya know what I mean. And THAT, my friends, is why I am a proud representative of the NCFA program.

[That's No Caffeine For Adults for those of you who have a habit of skipping an entire paragraph of what you're reading on accident]

Well, if you'll excuse me I have a date with a huge American History project. But I imagine that it sounds like more fun than what you're doing right now at work. Am I right?

Thought so.
-Ash

What Grinds My Gears

Ya know what really grinds my gears, folks? When you figure out that your dad smells better than you do. I'm not sayin' I stink... I'm just saying, "You smell terrific." [A quote from Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, for all of you anti-quoters out there] What is the key to his success? The secret: Hollister man-perfume.

When you hear the name Hollister... what do you think of? Teenage girls wearing too much makeup? Flip-flops? The beach? California? Most kids my age [13-14] associate Hollister with American Eagle, Aeropostale, and Abercrombie as the "cool" clothes. But not ONLY does Hollister sell clothes. You are also able to purchase $15.00 flip-flops, $100 fur lined jackets, AND cologne/perfume. If someone could clone a beach and put it in a bottle, that's what it smells like. Almost indescribable. And once you smell it; there's no goin' back. Unfortunately, this elixir of life doesn't come cheap. Forty bucks even. That kind of cash doesn't really come my way often... unless I save up the five dollar bills I get from the grandparents every holiday. I need a loan...

And that concludes What Grinds My Gears.
~Hollister-Ash

Shop Class For Dummies

In school I get great grades and I have made on Honor Roll every quarter for over two years, although, Shop is not one of my best subjects. In sixth grade, I attempted to make a "can crusher"[which is practically pointless when you have a dog like Dozer to do it for you] and the wooden assembly pieces have been laid to rest in the back corner of my closet. In seventh grade, I tried making a wooden race car... and almost made it! All I needed was to attach the wheels ,and as I was nearing the finish line of completion, my car came across a serious "road block" in the form of a non-protective backpack. Thus: broken.

Discouraged, I was not looking forward to this year's quarter of girl punishment. Then, a few weeks into the quarter, our Tech. Ed. teacher told us what we would be working on: a gumball machine lamp. Now most people wouldn't even bother working a gumball machine into a lamp, but after all, we aren't most people.

We organized the classroom's unwilling recruits to form an assembly line for all of the wood works. Sanding, staining, polishing, drilling, routing, checking, gluing, screwing[not the sick kind, either], and other crap I hate. Luckily for me, the manly guys in my hour excitedly helped me through it. But sure enough, here I am with a B-E-A-U-TIFUL finished project.
All's well that ends well.
See ya,
Ash

The Amazing Soloist...ME!

"Well LA DEE FRICKIN' DA! We got a musician in the house!" That's what Matt Foley [The motivational speaker] would say to me if he heard about my Hey Jude solos at the 8th grade MS Christmas concert. Which were brilliant, might I add. Our band director really does challenge our bands, but I'm glad because he's taught me so much about music. But don't get the wrong idea here, I'm not "in love" with my director. In case you haven't heard, my director is a little... different. [Not that there's anything wrong with that, not at all] Examples:

• He gets regular perms, but is in his fifties
• We have visual proof that he owns pink hair curlers in his desk
• He and his wife "W" have been spotted several times [by me on my way home from school] jogging in matching yellow spandex jumpsuits. They could secretly be crime-fighting superheros for all I know
• He's involved in some different form of karate/self-defence, wearing [again] black spandex Capris, with his curly, bushy white hair pulled back with a hairband

If that's not enough for you, TOO BAD. I'm sure there's more, but unfortunately I have secured my brain in it's box for tonight. So on a happy note: Get offa' your computer chair, go buy some pink hair curlers or some spandex and wear them to work tomorrow, in loyal representation of him. That is all I ask from you people.